Memorial Day means more to me each year

I start to prepare for our Memorial publication during February each year.   It becomes a little more difficult each year to prepare. Throughout the process I am forced by the nature of the publication to think about my life in the Marine Corps and the men and women I have met and served with.

In years past I have written about men who have given their lives for our country while still in their youth.  They were part of the those who paid the ultimate price that many of our young people paid during the Vietnam War.

This year’s Memorial Day message from the Veterans of Foreign Wars seeks to bring the meaning of the day to include those who are still serving.  The message states, “Our responsibility and obligation to our veterans should not end when the last rally is over.  Veterans deserve better than that.  The defenders of this nation fulfilled their duty and obligation to us, and we have an equal duty to honor and fulfill our obligations to them.”

Memorial Day is now considered a day to honor not only those who have died in battle, but all servicemen who have fought for our freedoms.  If the present day war has shown us anything it has shown us that for those who fight in the modern day wars, the war never seems to leave them. 

Now they are faced with a higher than usual number of suicides after serving in Iraq or Afghanistan.  It means that the war may be over but the battle still goes on for many who have served. It has been noted for years that Vietnam Veterans make up an extraordinary number of veterans being treated for post traumatic stress disorder, this number will probably go higher for the Iraq wars. 

My thoughts and prayers extend to those Marines I know who have served and returned.  They have paid a slightly higher price for freedom than most of us are asked to pay.  So I feel it is only fitting that when we talk about those who have died in the service or our country we include them.  Whether I am right or wrong I cannot seem to separate them out when I think about those veterans who have died. It should not make any difference whether their death is during a war or many years later.     

It may feel this way because this year is the first time I can remember that I will be thinking about two Marines I have known who passed away within the last year.  These men were able to fulfill their American dream after serving in Vietnam and making it into their retirement years. 

The time I spent with these two men in 1963 was limited, five months.  They were five months of some of the most historic times in the history of our country.  The times we were in are an important part of history now and will be remembered in the history of our country forever.  We were together when President John F. Kennedy was killed.  During those times we were attending a special military school just outside of Baltimore, MD.

As the world mourned all around us we were forced to stay on base and not be part of historical events just miles away.  Instead we spent it talking and wondering where the country would go next.  We knew from the moment President Kennedy was shot that the course of our nation would change.  These conversations lasted for hours at a time.  Forty some years later when we held a reunion the conversations continued right where they left off.  We are a band of brothers. 

We wondered why we were able to bond so quickly and remember so much.  One of the men in the group said it probably had more to do with the times and that moment in history than it did being Marine Corps brothers.  The truth is you can’t separate the two. We were brothers in history and brothers in the Vietnam era. 

Most of us went on to serve in Vietnam.  With a few exceptions we never crossed paths again until 2005.  That was the year that one member of our class took the time to locate many of us and schedule the reunion.  Since that reunion we have stayed in contact with one another on a regular basis.

Within the last year two members of our class have passed away.  One went through a long hard path to his death with cancer taking over most of his upper body.  What he gave us all up until the day he died was his great sense of humor.  We called him Red.  One of his personal stories was when his picture was on the front pages of many newspapers as the Midshipman who graduated at the bottom of his class. This may be because of what they didn’t say; Red was a man who lived life to the fullest. 

The other member, Bill, died suddenly after heart surgery.  His death took us all by surprise.  In addition to being a husband and father and grandfather Bill will be remembered for his willingness to help others. 

What I was unprepared for in both cases, but especially in Bill’s case were my feelings about their deaths. In 2005 we knew Red had cancer and he managed to hang on for three more years.  So we were more thankful that he had those extra years with us.  Bills’ death, as I said, was sudden and a shock. It may be because of that his death hit me the hardest.

After Bill died I realized that the men I served with are now going to be passing on more frequently than I would like. I guess what really strikes me is the difference between the deaths of World War II veterans at the rate of 1,000 per day and the ongoing deaths of Vietnam Veterans.  It is an honor to all veterans of any time that they be remembered on Memorial Day, but the ones that have hit me the hardest are the ones from Vietnam.  When I hear about Vietnam veterans dying, I can relate to that on a more personal basis. It is another way of telling me I am getting older. 

This Memorial Day I will be spending time remembering all those who have served our country and are no longer with us.  Please take a moment and say a prayer for them.

A National Moment of Remembrance will be honored again this year on Memorial Day, May 25th   at 3 p.m. local time, pause and think about the meaning of the day.  A moment of time for a lifetime of living with freedom is not a high price to pay.